Being Tone Deaf...

My father's family are gifted musicians.  My grandpa, Clarence LeRoy Bentley, died when my dad was 8, but before that he was a coal miner and a singer.  Singing at clubs in Pleasant Grove and entertaining.  My Dad sang a lot as a boy and won a local contest for singing MacNamara's Band.  So music is in my blood I suppose.

All growing up my mother is a self proclaimed "tone deaf" individual.  I inherited this trait from her.  I came this conclusion because when I was in primary my friend Angela turned to me during singing time and said, "Stop singing off key."

I was crushed!  Had I been singing off key, what was off key anyway?  Well at the tender age of 9 I vowed I would NEVER sing again.  Silly, I know that now, but I thought at the time, if I can't even tell that I'm off, how will I ever know when I am on?  And being off key really irritates some people and in my weak mind it seemed the only honorable option :)

Years of lip singing during primary and young women's, my deep secret was well hidden.  I could not sing and no one was going to laugh at me for it.  Oh the pride of youth.

Then one day, I was at the piano and I played a D and just by chance my voice matched and.....

I HEARD IT!!!!!!

I was finally singing the right note and I knew it!

I was almost in college and I finally could do what most could do as sunbeams.

I played the note again, that trusty D, and this time I was off and I couldn't get back on.

So I hammered that D again and again and again until I could hit it with only a little wibbling around.

I started singing VERY quietly at sacrament, and I realized how much more fun it was.

I still struggle to stay on pitch, but now I have found if I tug my right ear in just a bit I can even sing without the piano, almost on key.

So here is the take home for me that came through today...

We are born a bit tone deaf to the voice of the spirit.  I feel like I have gone for years not knowing if I was in or out of tune with the spirit.  Not to say I couldn't sing the right words...I'm always good at knowing the lyrics, but to truly be in tune and know it.  That is what I am striving for with the spirit.  So I am going to prove the Lord and diligently seek him so that I can sing his words.... on key!!!!  But learning from my childhood folly I know practice is the "key" (pun intended)

I have great faith that I can learn the delicate tones of the spirit, just as gifted musicians can hear the subtle variances in pitch.

There is a second part of the story...

I shared my pitch discovery with my mom and said, "Mom, If I can do this, you can too, just sit with me by the piano and let me help you find the note"

She agreed

We had to go to a low G for her until I matched the piano key to her note.  She teared up.

"Can you hear Mom?" I asked in earnest.

"I think I can!" she said smiling

You see there is no end to things you can do if you are willing to just try.

So I am going to play my spiritual D until I KNOW and not just think I know that the spirit and I are in Harmony :)